Title:          No Pie Author:         Rhonda Rating:         R Disclaimer:     Not mine and never will be. Spoilers:       100,000 Airplanes, barely Note:           This is just dialogue, just for fun.                No plot warning in effect.                January State of the Union Challenge Feedback:       Greatly appreciated at   dossett@azalea.net ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Toby:  "There's not any pie in here." CJ:  "Right." Toby:  "Actually there's not much of anything in here but warm        beer and uh, rice." CJ:  "Right again." Toby:  "It's not my fault we're stuck in here." CJ:  "Right." Toby:  "Is that all you're going to say?" CJ:  "Would you prefer I tell you exactly what I think?" Toby:  "Probably not." ~~~~~~~~~~ Toby:  "Do you want another beer?" CJ:  "No, I think I'm drunk enough." Toby:  "What does that mean?" CJ:  "I'm drunk enough not to care we're stuck in a freezer      in the basement of the White House." Toby:  "Actually, it's a cooler, like a refrigerator." CJ:  "It's not cool in here." Toby:  "It's broken." CJ:  "Like the door." Toby:  "Yeah." CJ:  "Give me another beer." ~~~~~~~~~~ CJ:   "Why does the light work if the freezer's broken?" Toby:  "Do I look like an electrician?  And, it's a cooler." CJ:  "I don't care what you call it.  Freezer, cooler,      coffin, it's all the same.  I thought the light went off      when you shut the door." Toby:  "I think that's just your refrigerator at home.        Come on this isn't so bad." CJ:  "We're missing the party upstairs." Toby:  "That's my point." ~~~~~~~~~~ Toby:  "Why would the White House need all these bags        of  rice?" CJ:  "So we would have something to lie on down here." Toby:  "Makes as much sense as anything, I guess." CJ:  "Actually with the bags laid out like this, it's more      comfortable than my bed at home." Toby:  "I haven't slept in my bed for a week." CJ:  "Well, the State of the Union speech is done now,      maybe you can visit it more often." Toby:  "Visit what?" CJ:  "Your bed." Toby:  "What about my bed?" CJ:  "You're drunk, aren't you?" Toby:  "Maybe, but don't change the subject.  Have you ever        thought about seeing my bed?" CJ:  "Seeing your bed?" Toby:  "No, sleeping in my bed." CJ:  "This conversation is giving me a headache.      What are you talking about?" Toby:  "Pay attention, CJ.  I'm trying to proposition you." CJ:  "Okay." Toby:  "Okay, what?" CJ:  "Proposition me." Toby:  "Here?" CJ:  "What?" Toby:  "You want to have sex here?" CJ:  "I didn't say that.  You said you wanted to proposition      me.  I said okay." Toby:  "Then why are we still talking?" CJ:  "What?" Toby:  "Take off your clothes.  I can do a better job that way." CJ:  "Ha ha, very funny, Toby.  You really had me going there      for a minute." Toby:  "Most women wait until I'm completely undressed before        they laugh." CJ:  "What are you doing? Toby?" Toby:  "What do you mean what am I doing?  Can't have sex        with your pants on, CJ.  I thought you said you were        good in bed?" CJ:  "Toby, you really are drunk, aren't you?  Put those      back on." Toby:  "You've got great legs.  Have I told you that before?" CJ:  "Uh, no.  Toby stop that.  You're going to tear them." Toby:  "You smell good.  I always think you smell so good." CJ:  "Toby, this is a really bad idea.  Wait, you can't pull on      them like that." Toby:  "Why do women wear pantyhose anyway." CJ:  "Well, I won't be wearing this pair again." Toby:  "You still have your skirt on.  It's going to get wrinkled." CJ:  "Toby get off me.  This skirt cost me $150.  You're going      to rip it.  Wait.  Okay, let me lift up." Toby:  "Can I take this off or is there a special way to do it too?" CJ:  "Are you sure about this?" Toby:  "About what?  Getting this blouse off you?  You bet." CJ:  "Wait, you just pulled a button off." Toby:  "Okay, now how does this come off?" CJ:  "It goes over my head, not down.  Toby, wait, the other      way.  Okay, that works too, I guess."   Silence filled the cooler. CJ:  "What are you doing?" Toby:  "Looking.  I'm looking at you.  You're incredible." CJ:  "Come here." Toby:  "You feel good." CJ:   "Move up just a little.  Right there." Toby:  "Do you like that?" CJ:   "Yeah, but don't mark my neck.  The Press would have       field day." Toby:  "These are bigger than I thought." CJ:  "This is bigger than I thought." Toby:  "You thought about my . . ." CJ:  "Your what?" Toby:  "Joystick." CJ:  "You're going to have to prove that one." Toby:  "I'm always up for a challenge." CJ:  "Keep talking and I'm going to change my mind." Toby:  "Do you like that?" CJ:  "Toby, I'm not a paint by numbers kit, just get on         with it." Toby:  "You don't want me to talk?" CJ:  "When you talk, you stop whatever else you're doing." Toby:  "No one ever complained before." CJ:  "Roll over." Toby:  "What?" CJ:   "You heard me, move it, Ziegler." Toby:  "I like being on top." CJ:  "Tough, now you can talk all you want." Toby:  "Uh, CJ?" CJ:  "What?" Toby:  "I think this is Minute Rice."